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Old 04-10-2003, 07:23 PM   #133
Icarus4578
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 12,550
Painful but pleasing?

Divine Sealing - Mega Drive - Rating 0
Yup, you read that review rating number correctly. Zero. Zip. Nothing. That's exactly what Divine Sealing deserves. You think you've played bad shooters? Heh. You ever play a little import Playstation hemmorhoid that goes by the title Two-Ten Kaku? That's bad. Is there anything worse than Two-Ten Kaku? I'd wager Divine Sealing takes the cake, but there may be a few here and there flaoting around too painful to recall.
Divine Sealing is a shooter/hentai (pervert) game. No, the fact that it displays nude girls doesn't take away from my rating. But in this case, the shooting is so bad, the stages so ultra boring, and the bosses, music, and control so pathetic, well... I'm at a loss. Ever been walking down a street and somebody threw a rock at you? That's what playing Divine Sealing is like. No... it's actually worse than that.
What can I say good about Divine Sealing? There's five stages of stunningly awful shooting to keep you glued to the tube. No... that doesn't work out well... Wait... Maybe it's the jaw-droppingly horrible soundtrack that will make your stereo attack you. Err... The graphics aren't so bad for a shooter... No, that's lying. I shouldn't lie. What does Divine Sealing have? Nude girls that strip full screen after you successfully complete any stage. They cycle through four/five full-screen stills of each girl talking to you in Japanese (using text) and then it's on to the next stage. For those of you who want a level skip code to go straight to the pics, here you go (I guess): During the game, to skip a stage, pause the game, and then keep pressing down+A+B+C until the stage ends. Repeat each stage.
Have you ever had to sit through the movie Beaches in its entirety? A traumatic experience to say the least. Add Divine Sealing to that list. It is surely the worst shooting game available on Genesis/Mega Drive.
The things I tolerate for you people....

Take a look (no nudity shown here) ~ http://www.vgmuseum.com/pics2/divine.html
Here's the original source of the shots, which lists tons of Genesis/Mega Drive games you can view ~ http://www.vgmuseum.com/test98.html
And here's my review as it appears on OPCFG, albeit slightly different. Includes screenshots ~ http://www.geocities.com/opcfg3/dsreview.html

Last edited by Icarus4578; 08-03-2004 at 10:19 AM.
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