View Full Version : Welshfreak's Reviews- Spamming up a forum near you!

08-21-2005, 12:17 PM
Now even Welshfreak has taken up a scrutinising, picking at and generally complaining about games that some people spend up to 3-4 years making, but once in a while, those games that pop up in our local shops are actually not bad; and then, only then will I shower them blindly with fanboyish praise, claiming it another step in gaming evolution....

But enough of that, you've read the trailer, now for the feature, expect reviews of games I have come across in my 14 years of existance and any that people especially want reviewing, if just to accertain their fanboy lusts for the game in question.

So, while some may dissagree with my opinion (which by the way, i'm entitled too) if you wish to ciriticize, at least make it constructive, because if it is'nt, then it's falling on deaf ears. So thanks for reading this, just hope you read some of the reviews now.

Nintendo 64 reveiws

Goldeneye 64 (http://www.the-magicbox.com/forums/showthread.php?t=13989)
Super Mario 64 (http://www.the-magicbox.com/forums/showthread.php?p=221234#post221234)

PC reviews

Rome Total War- (Bottom of Page 2) (http://www.the-magicbox.com/forums/showthread.php?p=229047#post229047)

08-21-2005, 01:42 PM
Recently the name Goldeneye has been blemished by EA's lacklustre effort 'Goldeneye Rouge Agent' which tried to change the Bond formula too much, without addressing and changing what was wrong with it in the first place. But the Goldeneye we are talking about is the one that appeared on the N64 in 1997 developed by Rare, the company that we know was sold to Microsoft from Nintendo in 2003. This game has sold millions of copies worldwide to date, and it is not too difficult to know why.

Obviously the plot generally follows the film released in 1995, so to save space, I suggest you go watch it, it?s all the ?save the world? James Bond routine. Except playing the game is probably better that watching the film.

The gameplay of Goldeneye is the part of the game that sold. This is ironic considering how the initial plan from the guys at Rare was to produce an ?On Rails? Shooter. I?m sure a lot of people are more than glad that didn?t happen. Instead, it became a shooter game, in which the player was free to roam within the 18 levels, plus 2 unlockable after extensive play on the Secret Agent and 00 Agent difficulty levels. The interface of the game is quite easy to use in my opinion, with the N64 controller living up to the job of strafing with the yellow arrows and squeezing the Z trigger with the index finger. My only complaint would have to be with the aiming, as pressing L or R to aim and the control stick combined seems twitchy and lacks the pin point control needed for a successful first person shooter. But I found I quickly forgave the so-so aiming because the memorable level designs of Goldeneye more than makes up for it. The quality and the fact that there are stealth and shoot-?em up levels means that things don?t become too stale and boring. Wherever it is roaming about the snowy Servenaya winterland picking off a wondering patrol guard, or shooting to stay alive in the Control Centre, this game has gameplay that will genuinely entertain.

The graphical side of Goldeneye is a hard area to review. Being an old game, 8 years old, the graphics cannot compete with today?s shooters, like Halo 2 or Call of Duty or whatever. But in their day, they were glorious, with people from the development team having their ugly faces pasted onto the soldier?s faces. But it is still very playable as the graphics have aged well, and despite the more than dodgy framerate when you run about with guards filling the screen, it won?t stop your enjoyment of the game. Moving on, the music; an area usually neglected by developers has not been forgotten by Rare.
Each level has different music, mainly punchy techno mixes that really do go well with the levels they accompany. It?s music that you will nod your head to when it first comes on at the beginning of the level sometimes it is a techno version of the original Bond soundtrack. Good stuff. Sound wise, the gun noises are satisfying as you punch 5 rounds into a Marine?s chest then he crumples to the ground in stifled agony. Unfortunately there are not many enemy sounds stored on that 64 bit cartridge and no speech, so people who enjoyed the long, twisty, turning cut scenes from games like Metal Gear Solid are going to be disappointed.

The Health bars and inventory is all standard stuff, it?s easy to manage and the multiplayer is good fun, but sadly not as fun as it used to be because the standards for multiplayer has been risen, with AI bots and online, Goldeneye just has 4 player unadultured joy. But that's not saying it's not fun.

In conclusion(at last!) of this long review, I have to say, that Goldeneye is an extremely competent game, with plenty of unlockables (it took me 6 years to complete) and a great soundtrack and a good multiplayer to boot. Being an old game, it may scare off the pre teens reading, but I thoroughly recommend it to anyone who hasn?t got it (anybody?) because Goldeneye really is golden gaming.

Rating- 8.8/10

Based on my opinion, not maths.

How come shinning a torch in Bond's eyes ripps a chunk of health off?!

08-21-2005, 01:55 PM
Well, welcome to the review circle :D

08-21-2005, 01:58 PM
Well, welcome to the review circle :D

What have I let myself in for?! :sweat:

By the way, I chose Goldeneye because it is a gaem almost everyone has heard of and played, so it's a nice one to start off with.

08-21-2005, 08:04 PM
So what do think of Perfect Dark then?

Paper exe
08-22-2005, 01:59 AM
Good to see that you are reviewing games now.

08-22-2005, 02:51 AM
maybe next I will do reviews!

wait and prepare for it my lackies!

08-22-2005, 07:50 AM
What next people?

08-22-2005, 07:57 AM
Next you could fix the link in your first post. You have two https.

And review Super Mario 64. Give it a 10 and proof Icarus wrong.

08-22-2005, 08:00 AM
how do I fix it? Sorry to ask, i'm so dumb at computers...

08-22-2005, 08:06 AM
Seems to me like you already did.

08-22-2005, 03:11 PM
Nin- expect a Mario 64 review in the next 72 hours, you an icarus can have a flame war again. heh heh. :cool guy:

08-22-2005, 03:20 PM
While we're on the subject of Mario, you can review Mario Sunshine as well.

08-22-2005, 03:23 PM
While we're on the subject of Mario, you can review Mario Sunshine as well.

Good idea, don't expect it right away, but it will happen very, very shortly, maybe by Friday. :)

08-22-2005, 04:05 PM

I want to know if they'll be good or not!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111111111


08-22-2005, 06:25 PM
I'd never have enough patience to shell out reviews.

Anyway, review... Wario Land 3! :D

08-23-2005, 09:09 AM
Next you could fix the link in your first post. You have two https.

And review Super Mario 64. Give it a 10 and proof Icarus wrong.

No good seeing as I've already proven myself to be right! Face it! Mario 64 has become a mediocre experience along the lines of the original SMB on the NES. You can't sit there collecting the same 120 Stars over and over and over again and pretend that it's the greatest thing ever conceived. That's called living in denial. Heck, Mario 3, SMW and Yoshi's Island can have M64 for breakfast, lunch and dinner, and then come back to the dinner table for dessert as well. :cool:

08-23-2005, 09:37 AM

08-23-2005, 09:48 AM
A few more minutes and my review will be ready!!

08-23-2005, 10:08 AM
Way Back in 1996 Princess Toadstool Peach invited Mario over for a bite to eat (yeah right). So, our love struck hero was falling head over heels to get to her castle, I mean, how often do you have lunch with royalty? Waddling breathlessly, he squeezed his portly frame down a green warp pipe, (the buses in Mushroom Kingdom were on strike), and he erupted out the other end screaming ?woo whooo?! Looking around him, slightly dazed, to his exhilaration and amazement and that of the player, the whole of Peach?s front yard was all around him, in ALL 3 DIMENSIONS. Even his own belly was displayed in glorious 3D. All across the world, suicide rates tumbled, the sun shone, the world had become a better place all round. This was Mario. This was N64. This was Super Mario 64.

Sitting down to play, I thought pretty much everything changes through time, technology, people, places- but surprisingly enough, I found that the gameplay on some of the older games I have been playing, Goldeneye for example, doesn?t actually change, it?s just the person?s perceptions of what their playing. The same with Mario 64, people will see the chunky graphics and the out of date camera and think that the experience of almost a decade ago has changed. Well it hasn?t, the person has changed, not the console. I don?t see the console fairies sneaking in at night and fiddling with your old games and changing them; that?s for the developers in a few years time, ready to cash in on the nostalgia, it?s just the person playing has seen better in the next generation and decided that their older games are bad, but all it is that expectations and standards have been raised.
Mario 64 has a lot of variation in the levels with different landscapes and different ways to get stars and coins. People who say it gets repetitive should remember that there are 120 stars in there- can you think of 120 ways to collect stars? I can?t, for sure. Does it matter if you have to climb a snowy mountain for 1 star and fly to the top of an Egyptian pyramid for another? I personally don?t think so, because both experiences are completely different for me so I don?t care. The action is very solid and accomplished, even today, not fantastic, but I would prefer it to something like Scooby Doo Adventure from 2005. The 3D camera was another gameplay element added. Moving it around with the yellow C buttons is hard, but OK considering being one of the first ever and without it, the game would collapse, not being able to judge tricky jumps and obstacles. I find nothing about Mario 64?s gameplay offensive or numbingly boring or the AI hard or too easy, so on to the next section.

Graphically, Mario 64 stands out as one of the first 3D games in existence. It is very boxy and chunky, and it is full of primary colours. In a way, it?s like a great aunt who is quick to hug you when you meet; old, out of date, but sweet and warm as well. It looks like a child has used his paints to colour the land in bright reds, yellows and greens, but as time has gone on and technology improved, cracks can be easily seen in the games appearance, but you can see what is going on clearly as things are kept simple, with little texture or bump mapping and such, so don?t expect anything fancy now days.

Musically, Mario 64 is full of trumpet blowing, jazzy old Mario tunes that are on annoying 30 second loops, but still have their charm and amazingly I found myself humming along to the tune on Bomb-omb Battlefield. Each level has different music to suit the mood of the level, hazy Maze Cave is mysterious, Exotic eastern music on amongst the pyramids and the chilling carousel tune in the Haunted Mansion. Sounds are decent as well, lots of ?Whoopee!? ?HA ha!? from the man in red and enemy sounds, but as you would expect, it?s pretty limited.

No multiplayer to be found, but that?s another excuse to get a DS, and to test Mario 64?s aging process I played Modern Platformers, Crash Bandicoot on PS2 and Banjo Kazooie Grunty?s revenge and quickly I was able to spot the similarities between the generation. The hub worlds, the collecting 100 whatever, it can all be found in the 3D world of Mario 64, which was one of the first 3D games to successfully incorporate these into the game environment, which shows why today?s game developer?s still use it for reference and how Mario 64 became a staple in today?s gaming world, it set the standard 9 years ago, and although the standard has increased, the fact that games today still bare the essence of Mario 64, is good enough for me. A great slice of gaming history.

Rating- 8.5/10

Classic, that set the standard 9 long years ago.


08-23-2005, 11:06 AM
If anyone has any comments on the reviews/ constructive critizism, then it will be appricaiated. :)

08-23-2005, 11:10 AM
Constructive criticism: Add 1.5

08-28-2005, 11:50 PM
alright, welshfreak :cool guy: it is good to see more people writing reviews. keep it up and don't slack off like me.

08-29-2005, 01:20 AM
Good review... but you should subtract a couple of points because Luigi was not to be found... you get 120 stars FOR WHAT??? a panzy ass green dinosaur with a Peach pleasuring long tongue... I would rather have a panzy ass green plumber any day.

oh yeah, review some DS games.

08-29-2005, 10:19 PM
Do you like the DS Mario better?

I don't really like one over the other. I loved the original Mario 64, and this the DS is just a way to play it on the go.

08-30-2005, 09:04 AM
My next review will be tommorow or the day after, not saying what it is though...

DS mario is a more accomplished game, but control issues let it down.

09-17-2005, 09:51 AM
Rome Total War is your typical Real Time Strategy with a nice twist. Brought out this time last year, a British game, by the guys down at Creative Assembly, which has recently been taken over by Sega from Activison. The Total War series on the PC, has received good publicity, and decent reviews, the Rome version has been preceded by Shogun and Medieval Total War, fairly decent titles today, but inevitably very outdated graphically, since there is a lot of slowdown and jerky action. But onto the main attraction, Rome Total War (RTW) has a lot still going for it.

This game works as you are a Roman (or other) general who has great control over hundreds of troops in a realistic game environment. Basically, once you have the game installed on the PC and you enter the main menu etc, you have a few options, the most important being Quick Battle, Custom Battle and Campaign Mode. These are pretty much self explanatory so I won?t dive to much into word perfect definitions, but basically, Custom Battle and Campaign Mode are the two most likely to hold your attention for the minute. I love Custom Battle because you get to spend you currency (denari) on the best troops from the Roman era and have huge monster battles without worrying about the consequences. Enough said.

Then we have the largest chunk of the game in the Campaign mode, which works with you choosing a ?Family? of the Roman Empire, like the ?Juli?, who live in Northern Italy. You have advisers and the usual set up to hold your hand through the first half an hour, but soon you will want to push your armies through France, or Northern Africa or Greece or wherever- there is a great amount of free choice involved, which obviously makes the action spicier. The campaign map, where you will be spending a good deal of your time, is just a big map of Europe, North Africa and the Middle East, looking pretty with different landscapes, snow in the winter and even volcanic eruptions at Mount Vesuvius (Pompeii)! Your troops, leaders, diplomats, spies and enemy/ally units are all placed out on the map as little people, you can merge units into one to make armies stronger and you move them about over the land just through traditional right clicking. A point to be made is that the land is split up into little portions, each civilisation owning a few of these portions at the start of the game, which can be invaded by sieging or assaulting the settlements in the portion of land. I really enjoy having battering rams, knocking down walls and as your men run under boiling oil scalding them- a decent set of speakers makes it horrifying to listen to.

The battle system is fantastic on a whole, troop deployment got out of the way before the battle starts, to save hassle, the ability to zoom right into the thick of a hand fought brawl, just as a unit of cavalry storm in, breaking the ranks, forcing the enemy to flee, in a scrambled, blind panic, only for you general and his cronies to scythe down the routers. Breath taking.
The battle system allows for strategy to play a big part, but for the more action inclined of the public, ?Arcade Battle? is an option, for less realism-more action. The fact that you can control the towns you occupy, you can even have them slaughtered, down to tax rates and building schedules and it is important to keep the population happy because they will revolt and kick you out if they are powerful enough.

Graphically, this game excels and with a good computer, you can really get the full atmosphere of being in the middle of a fight for Rome. The individual troops are all well crafted, which is phenomenal considering you can have a few thousand on the field at a time. Just look at the screenshot, or dig some out for yourself, because this really is a beauty to look at and watch in action.

Musically, the classic war themes are present, which perfectly compliments the fact that people are going to get killed. Sounds are great, the crumple of a crowd crush, the clink of metal and the thundering hooves of heavy cavalry all make this war game seem like a real war. Making your general urge the troops on in the midst of battle, when the going is tough and his pre-battle speech to rouse the troops, all play to create a perfect atmosphere, which is lacking with most games today.

Being a PC game, we get the multiplayer set up you would expect, LAN support and online fun, which I have only tried once, but as long as everyone is of similar ability, co-operating tactics and forces can lead to some memorable battles. Allies can secretly talk to one another so you have to keep your wits about you, because one second off the boil and you will pay. In a sentence- if you can go online- then do go online.

Wow, what can I say about this game, bad points include some difficulty moving troops and the sheer amount of bugs in there, but thankfully there are patched downloadable from the Activison website to cure most of these problems. If you have bothered reading this review, or have just skipped to the bottom, then my opinion will be the same- this a one hell of a game and if you find any RTS half decent then you would be mad not to snap this up- especially considering it?s a year old and it?s cheaper, plus the expansion pack, Barbarian Invasion is out before Christmas.

Welshfreak?s score- 9.3/10

Damn good RTS.

Barbeque City.
http://www.armchairempire.com/images/Reviews/pc/rome-total-war/rome-total-war-2.jpg This is the Campaign map, nice and snowy in the winter.